Very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Some times he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy, the sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical, summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds, pretty standard really. At the age of 12 I received my first scribe.
Open
| Year | Rank Worldwide | Rank by Region | Rank By Country | Rank By Affiliate | ||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 2026 | 1385th Men (60-64) | 391st Men (60-64) North America West | 851st Men (60-64) United States | 1st Men (60-64) Rayzor Ranch CrossFit | ||||
| 2025 | 2303rd Men (55-59) | 590th Men (55-59) North America West | 1331st Men (55-59) United States | 1st Men (55-59) Rayzor Ranch CrossFit | ||||
| 2024 | 2459th Men (55-59) | 677th Men (55-59) North America West | 1438th Men (55-59) United States | 1st Men (55-59) Rayzor Ranch CrossFit | ||||
| 2023 | 1630th Men (55-59) | 451st Men (55-59) North America West | 996th Men (55-59) United States | 1st Men (55-59) Rayzor Ranch CrossFit | ||||
| 2022 | 2007th Men (55-59) | 1359th Men (55-59) North America | 1249th Men (55-59) United States | 1st Men (55-59) CrossFit Denton | ||||
| 2021 | 1728th Men (55-59) | 1308th Men (55-59) North America | 1217th Men (55-59) United States | 1st Men (55-59) CrossFit Denton | ||||
| 2020 | 83184th Men | 2517th Men (50-54) | – – | 36319th Men United States | 1646th Men (50-54) United States | – – | ||
| 2019 | 127518th Men | 3300th Men (50-54) | – – | 59072nd Men United States | 2222nd Men (50-54) United States | – – | ||
| 2018 | 145872nd Men | 3193rd Men (50-54) | 8674th Men South Central | 200th Men (50-54) South Central | 74465th Men United States | 2251st Men (50-54) United States | – – | |
| 2017 | 124678th Men | 2191st Men (50-54) | 8030th Men South Central | 149th Men (50-54) South Central | 67095th Men United States | 1543rd Men (50-54) United States | – – | |
Benchmark Stats
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2007 Hopper -- 30 Muscle-ups For Time -- Abbate -- Adambrown -- Adrian -- Alec -- Alexander -- Amanda -- Andi -- Andy -- Angie -- Annie -- Arnie -- Artie -- Back Squat 1RM -- Back Squat 3RM -- Back Squat 5RM -- Badger -- Bar Muscle-ups -- Barbara -- Barbara Ann -- Barraza -- Bell -- Bench Press 1RM -- Bench Press 3RM -- Bench Press 5RM -- Bert -- Big Sexy -- Bike 50 Cal -- Blake -- Bowen -- Bradley -- Bradshaw -- Brehm -- Brenton -- Brian -- Bruck -- Bulger -- Bull -- Buriak -- Cameron -- Candy -- Capoot -- Carse -- CHAD1000x -- Chelsea -- Chest-to-Bar Pull-ups -- Cindy -- City 100 -- Clean & Jerk 1RM -- Clean & Jerk 3RM -- Clean & Jerk 5RM -- Clovis -- Coe -- Coffey -- Coffland -- Collin -- Crain -- CrossFit Total -- Dae Han -- Dallas 5 -- Daniel -- Daniel Ray -- Danny -- Deadlift 1RM -- Deadlift 3RM -- Deadlift 5RM -- Del -- Desforges -- DG -- Diane -- Dobogai -- Dominic J. Hall -- Donny -- Dork -- Double-Unders -- Dragon -- Drew -- DT -- Dunn -- DVB -- Elizabeth -- Ellen -- Emily -- Erin -- Estrada -- Eva -- Eva Strong -- Falkel -- Feeks -- FERN -- Fight Gone Bad -- Filthy 50 -- Finseth -- Foo -- Forrest -- Fournier -- Fran -- Free Handstand Hold -- Freestyle Diane -- Front Squat 1RM -- Front Squat 3RM -- Front Squat 5RM -- Gage -- Gale Force -- Gallant -- Garbo -- Garrett -- Gator -- Gaza -- GHD Annie -- Glen -- Goose -- Grace -- Grettel -- Griff -- Gunny -- Gwen -- Hall -- Hamilton -- Hammer -- Hammy -- Handstand Push-ups -- Hang Power Clean 1RM -- Hang Power Clean 3RM -- Hang Power Clean 5RM -- Hang Power Snatch 1RM -- Hang Power Snatch 3RM -- Hang Power Snatch 5RM -- Hang Squat Clean 1RM -- Hang Squat Clean 3RM -- Hang Squat Clean 5RM -- -
Hang Squat Snatch 1RM -- Hang Squat Snatch 3RM -- Hang Squat Snatch 5RM -- Hansen -- Harper -- Havana -- Heavy Grace -- Helen -- Helton -- Hidalgo -- Hildy -- Holbrook -- Holleyman -- Hollywood -- Hoover -- Hope -- Hortman -- Horton -- Hotshots 19 -- Ingrid -- Isabel -- J.J. -- Jack -- Jack's Triangle -- Jackie -- Jag 28 -- Jared -- Jason -- JBo -- Jennifer -- Jenny -- Jerry -- Johnson -- Jonathon Farmer -- Jorge -- Josh -- Josh-O -- Joshie -- Josie -- JT -- Justin -- K27 -- Karen -- Kelly -- Kelly Brown -- Kerrie -- Kev -- Kevin -- Klepto -- Kutschbach -- L-Sit Hold -- L1 Benchmark -- Ladder Nancy -- Lane -- Larry -- Laura -- Ledesma -- Lee -- Leehan -- Liam -- Linda -- Locke -- Loredo -- Lorenzo -- Luce -- Luke -- Lumberjack 20 -- Lyla -- Lynne -- Maggie -- Maloney -- Manion -- Manuel -- Marco -- Marguerita -- Marston -- Martin -- Mary -- Matt 16 -- Maupin -- Maxim 56 -- Maxton -- McCartney -- McCluskey -- McGhee -- Meadows -- Michael -- Miron -- Monti -- Moon -- Moore -- Morrison -- Mr. Joshua -- Muller -- Murph -- Muscle-ups -- Nancy -- Nasty Girls -- Nasty Girls V2 -- Nate -- Ned -- Nick -- Nickman -- Nicole -- Northrup -- Nukes -- Nunez -- Nutts -- ODA 7313 -- Omar -- Otis -- Overhead Squat 1RM -- Overhead Squat 3RM -- Overhead Squat 5RM -- Ozzy -- Partner Kelly -- Partner Weston -- Pat -- Paul -- Paul Pena -- Peyton -- Pheezy -- Pike -- Pikey -- PK -- Power Amanda -- Power Clean 1RM -- Power Clean 3RM -- Power Clean 5RM -- Power Snatch 1RM -- Power Snatch 3RM -- Power Snatch 5RM -- -
Pull-ups -- Push Jerk 1RM -- Push Jerk 3RM -- Push Jerk 5RM -- Push Press 1RM -- Push Press 3RM -- Push Press 5RM -- Rahoi -- Ralph -- Randy -- Rankel -- René -- Restrepo -- Rich -- Ricky -- Riley -- RJ -- Robbie -- Rocket -- Roney -- Row 1000m -- Row 100m -- Row 2000m -- Row 250m -- Row 3000m -- Row 500m -- Row 5K -- Roy -- Run 1 Mile -- Run 100m -- Run 10K -- Run 2 Miles -- Run 200m -- Run 400m -- Run 500m -- Run 5k -- Run 800m -- Run Row Run Rx -- Run Row Run Scaled -- Run Row Run Sprint -- Ryan -- Ryan Comas -- Ryan SO -- Santiago -- Santora -- Schmalls -- Scooter -- Scotty -- Sean -- Servais -- Severin -- Sham -- Shawn -- Ship -- Shoulder Press 1RM -- Shoulder Press 3RM -- Shoulder Press 5RM -- Sisson -- Small -- Smykowski -- Spehar -- Split Jerk 1RM -- Split Jerk 3RM -- Split Jerk 5RM -- Squat Clean 1RM -- Squat Clean 3RM -- Squat Clean 5RM -- Squat Snatch 1RM -- Squat Snatch 3RM -- Squat Snatch 5RM -- Stephen -- Strange -- Strict Elizabeth -- Strict Handstand Push-ups -- Strict Muscle-ups -- Strict Pull-ups -- T -- T.J. -- T.U.P. -- Tabata Something Else -- Tabata This! -- Tama -- Taylor -- Terry -- The Chief -- The Don -- The Ghost -- The Lyon -- The Other Total -- The Seven -- Thompson -- Thruster 1RM -- Thruster 3RM -- Thruster 5RM -- Tiff -- Time Priority Angie -- Timothy Helton -- TK -- Toes-to-Bar -- Tom -- Tommy V -- Topsy -- TPT9000 -- Triple Deuce -- Tully -- Tumilson -- Twelve Days of Christmas -- Tyler -- Viola -- Wade -- Wall Handstand Hold -- Walsh -- War Frank -- Weaver -- Weighted Pull-up 1RM -- Wes -- Wesley -- Weston -- White -- Whitt -- Whitten -- Willy -- Wilmot -- Wittman -- Woehlke -- Wood -- Wyk -- Yeti -- Zembiec -- Zeus -- Zimmerman --